A plebiscite? Yawn. Here’s a far more exciting dispatch from the frontlines of the War on Marriage. Polygamists are on the march:

The founder of a match-making website for Muslim men seeking multiple wives says the practice is growing in popularity in Australia, despite polygamy being illegal.

British founder of Secondwife.com, Azad Chaiwala, says the ‘social taboo’ of polygamy is fading away and that as many as 750 Australians use his website to find more spouses.

And here comes the victim card:

‘A lot of Muslims give their cultural background precedence instead of looking at what religion says,’ Mr Chaiwala told the Sydney Morning Herald.

‘There is a lot of stigma now against Muslims so they’re being stupidly cautious.’

Once same-sex marriage is well-ensconced, surely our friends on the Left won’t deny Muslims their right to practice their religion and culture as they see fit. This is a tolerant, diverse, multicultural society, after all.

Then, of course, we have the polyamory movement. Polyamory is basically polygamy for hipsters. Its practitioners don’t consider “poly” a lifestyle choice, but rather a sexual orientation. It’s a tale as old as time: the bird and the bee, the bird and the Eiffel Tower, two birds and three bees living together in a studio apartment in Newtown. It’s stunning and it’s brave, and if you think otherwise you’re a bigot.

I met a few “polys” during my time at the University of Sydney. Their explanations of their “orientation” was, unsurprisingly, couched in stale academic jargon like this:

If we start conceptualising our platonic relationships in similar ways to our romantic ones, surely we can begin to minimise the obligation of our romantic partners to deal with our imperfections? Why must these practices – viewing the romantic relationship as one of mutual education, forgiving their invisible broken parts and accepting the banality of practical life – be restricted to only the relationships that are romantic?

Try getting a skywriter to scrawl that over your romantic picnic for five.

It’s pretty safe to say that polygamy/amory is now totally inevitable. When Muslims and Cultural Marxists agree on something, there’s no stopping them. I estimate polygamy will be on the books within ten years, thanks to the impending explosion of Muslim immigration to Australia and the proliferation of sexual radicalism in the education system. When we do finally slip down that slope, the media will owe Cory Bernardi a huge apology. Not that he’ll ever get it.

But there’s a silver lining… for me, anyway. As the grandson of a Mormon, I expect my ancestors – early martyrs for the polygamist cause in the Anglosphere – will be duly honored by their intellectual and spiritual heirs.

It’s only common sense, right?