High life

I’d move to Kosovo if Ed Miliband became prime minister

Hanging out with Kosovar coke dealers would be preferable to watching Ed visit the Queen

9 May 2015

9:00 AM

9 May 2015

9:00 AM

If any of you sees Graydon Carter, the editor of Vanity Fair, walking around with a begging bowl in his hand, it’s because he took me to dinner recently. I sort of went a bit nuts with the wine and the VF chief ended up with the bill. We went to a new Bagel restaurant, Chevalier, a futuristic marvel with great food and wine and even grander prices. New York is no longer elegant, and there are no longer society types dressed to the nines sitting on the banquettes and downing Manhattans.

The Jewish ascendancy that downed the Wasps was as elegant as the one it replaced. William Paley, John Loeb and others like them dressed at Anderson & Sheppard, were shod by John Lobb, and had their shirts made by Sulka. They had exquisite manners and aped their predecessors. Now it’s slob time, and men dress the way I used to when I left the locker room for the playing field: sweatpants, a hoodie and trainers. But on the night I went to Chevalier, there were at least five tables with suited men and women that didn’t have ‘tart’ etched on their forehead. In order to celebrate, I got drunk and Graydon paid for the damage.

The strange thing about the Big Bagel in particular, and America in general, is that political discussion is a thing of the past. Anyone who disagrees with, say, the New York Times way of thinking is a bigot and a racist — no ifs or buts about it. Engaging civilly with those you disagree with, recognising their equality as citizens, has gone the way of high-button shoes and ladies with fans — not to mention standing up when a lady enters the room. This denies the superiority of reasoned argument over a punch in the face.

Liberalism’s father John Locke held that exercising reason was the highest perfection a man can attain in his life. John Stuart Mill ditto. But is it reasonable to maintain that any criticism of black violence is racist and that it leads to lynching à la 18th-century South? Is it reasonable to refer to police officers as practising genocide and being worse than Hitler? And does it make sense that a hotelier by the name of Ian Reisner, who lives with his male partner and is proudly gay, gives a dinner for the Republican presidential candidate Ted Cruz — who opposes gay marriage — and is then forced to eat humble pie, apologise and beg forgiveness when the gay lobby hears about it and threatens a boycott of all his hotel properties?

The only thing the left tolerates nowadays is complete agreement, and woe to those who dare disagree. Speech codes and kangaroo courts were a Nazi and Soviet speciality, but they’re alive and well here in the Big Bagel. The suppression of ideas that make people uncomfortable, such as young black unmarried women having numerous children who grow up in tough neighbourhoods and turn to crime as early as 12 years of age, or the instability of gay marriage, is no longer a top-down process. It is now bottom-up. In other words, elementary-school children now register their complaints and demand punishment for any offender. It’s like a 14-year-old coming up to me and telling me my ideas are unacceptable while holding up a copy of The Spectator drenched in excrement.

Public shaming is now the goût du jour, but thank God the dear old Speccie does not sell too many copies among inner-city black and Hispanic children. (Not that it would make much difference.) Here’s another example of liberal intolerance: during the making of The Ridiculous Six, a spoof of The Magnificent Seven, a number of Native Americans — dare I call them Red Indians? — walked off the set claiming the film’s content was offensive. A dozen actors walked out because one had a role called No Bra, while another was asked to urinate while smoking a peace pipe. Jesus H. Christ, if Catholics, or Christians in general, walked off sets because they were offended by anti-Christian jibes in movies, there would be only football on the screen, or reality shows.

The liberals booed when ‘Piss Christ’ was panned by the Catholic League 20 years ago, but a Native American is offended when asked to piss while smoking a pipe on the set of a spoof movie. And there’s more good news: whites are no longer having children in the Bagel, but Asians are, as are foreign-born moms. Three quarters of Hispanic and black mothers are on welfare, and two thirds of them are unwed. The only whites making whoopee are Orthodox Jews, who lead all races and creeds producing 28 babies each year per 1,000 residents in their Borough Park enclave. It makes one want to invest long term in New York City.

Mind you, the city’s problems are nothing compared with those of Britain. Just imagine a presidential candidate going to the house of an ass-wipe like Russell Brand and, well, ass-wiping him à la Ed Miliband. If I were a Brit, I’d move to Kosovo if and when the ghastly Ed becomes prime minister. Hanging out with a bunch of coke-dealing Kosovars must be a far more enriching experience than watching the gruesome Ed visiting the Queen. Poor Queen. Poor Britain.

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Show comments
  • ManOfKent

    So now the Spectator promotes foreign drug dealers does it? What an infantile paragraph. Clearly Taki would be better suited to doing time in some Kosovar Gulag than being allowed to write such drivel!

    And I think Miliband is a misfit but seriously what sort of idiot is now editing the Spectator? Oh its that urban liberal immigrant from Scotland isn’t it? Figures…..

    • post_x_it

      Taki has been writing this column for the best part of 40 years. Can hardly blame the current editor (except for not terminating it, if that’s what you mean).

  • PetaJ

    Taki has clearly discovered the same trend that I have: when trying to present a reasoned argument when disagreeing with what is acceptable in the eyes of the PC brigade, the decibel level of the shouts and the intensity of the venom poured out are in inverse proportion to the level of reason of which that person is capable.

  • Des Demona

    I thought you’d stopped hanging out with coke dealing Kosovars?

  • datnigga

    lets hang out dude!!! im a Kosovar but not a drug dealer … but yea we cant start such business sounds cool :D!

  • Jambo25


  • Shayan86

    Great, eff off. Don’t let the door hit you on the way out.

    • Jackthesmilingblack

      This is the common response of risk-averser losers washed up on the UK beach with the rest of the trash. The flotsam and jetsam of the stream of live.
      Jack, Japan Alps

      • But aren’t you one also?! Oh, sorry, you are not! If not—and you are not—then why do you keep trolling the comments’ sections of the articles of this BRITISH political magazine’s website?! Try to join a particular Gentlemen’s club in which you DON’T belong …

        • Jackthesmilingblack

          I’d never join a club that would accept me as a member.

  • Frank

    Had I known that you would move to Kosovo if Miliband gets in, I might well have voted for the moron.

  • thetruth.

    You don’t need to move to Kosovo, as Kosovo would not want someone that regards and generalizes its people as “drug dealers” in their nation. You need to educate yourself before speaking about an entire group of people, your perpetuating an stereotype of Kosovo. This leads to more and more ignorance amongst the people of the UK and the Western Nations and to be honest its not right. Learn about a place before include it in your article because you would be surprised to see the many things Kosovo has to offer.

    • Herzegovina

      Yeah burnt out churches and graveyards and minorities living in ghettos under an apartheid regime you mean. Stolen land treated with disdain. And Kosovars are the largest importers of heroin into Europe. FACT.

  • Marria Begum

    I’m surprised by the fact that you’re well-knowledgeable yet have made a supremely ignorant statement. So on second thought, perhaps not so knowledgeable. Kosovar coke dealers? Why so urgent to postulate around 1,844,822 citizens as ‘coke dealers’? Fact: coke dealers exist everywhere. It’s a shame that you throw this kind of light on a beautiful country, and you know what? Kosovo wouldn’t want you regardless.

    • oldoddjobs

      Oh boo hoo

  • jim

    Truth is unless you’re gay,a harpie or from the thirdworld you should be looking east.Go East Young Man.

  • Monkswood

    Errrr – bit out of date on this…

  • AndyB

    Fortunately, the election result has shown the centre-left consensus that no-one is allowed to (publically) diagree with is just another example of the ‘false consciousness’ which they invented and only they suffer from… Vivat Britannia

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  • Fritz123

    The Kosovo of Ismael Kadare was not so bad.