Rod Liddle

Fat-shaming works. Why else would I heave myself up and down hills for hours every day?

It’s either that, or move to the far north of Scotland

5 December 2015

9:00 AM

5 December 2015

9:00 AM

We have been contemplating moving to the North, for a variety of unassailable reasons. One is the chance to gloat on a daily basis. I will immediately become the thinnest and richest man in the village, which will do my flagging middle-aged self-confidence no end of good. Indeed, on the weight issue I could cease worrying completely and really pile on the pounds, simply moving another 100 miles north every time I reach the average weight of the indigenous population. Begin at 14 stone in, say, Coventry. When I reach 16 stone, move to Sheffield — and immediately become the thinnest man around once again. By the time my gut is so large I need a crane to drag me to McDonald’s and back I’ll be living somewhere near Paisley, or perhaps Oban. It used to be said that for every 50 miles you travel from London, you go back in time five years. Perhaps — but it is also true that for every 50 miles you can add a stone to the average weight of the population. In Oban, then, it is roughly 1965 and everyone is 25 stone. Suits me on both counts.

I work hard to stay well below 14 stone — ten miles a day walking up and down hills, heaving with exertion, all so that I am not ‘fat-shamed’ by the generally lithe smug-monkeys of the south-east, who are also much richer than I am. How they keep so thin and affluent is a mystery to me, because I almost never see them out exercising when I’m panting like a recently gassed badger, the dog yapping at me to keep up. Perhaps their thinness is genetic, much as is their money. But whatever, ‘fat-shaming’ has become a sort of pastime or form of political activism in this region, and especially in London. There is a social media community called Overweight Haters Ltd, which has taken to handing out printed cards to morbidly obese people on public transport. One fat woman ‘tweeted’ her displeasure at being handed one: ‘It’s really not glandular — it’s your gluttony,’ the card informed her, with a mixture of glee and disgust. ‘You are a fat, ugly human.’ The card listed the reasons why being overweight was essentially sociopathic (which of course it is): ‘We object to the enormous amount of food resources you consume while half the world starves,’ and stuff about how much fat people cost the beleaguered NHS.

When I first read this, I must admit I was in two minds. I suspect colloquial fat-shaming is more useful than any number of asinine government or third-sector programmes designed to combat obesity without making lard-mountains feel bad about themselves. The present imperative to de-stigmatise all manner of social ills as the consequence of a totally valid lifestyle choice seems to me misguided and counter-productive. Stigma, as a means of passive social control, works. More than decade ago, an adolescent niece of mine refused to push my young son in his pram in case she was mistaken for a teenage single mum, and thus a feckless slag-chav. Good! And it works with me, as you might have guessed from my hill-walking routine.

The supposedly lard-arsed woman in London who had been handed the card said that it ‘could upset -people struggling with confidence’, to which I would say — well, lose some weight and stop whining then, Miss Piggy. It’s worth pointing out that the recipient would have been considered an ethereal fairy creature, a naiad or a sylph, in, say, Darlington. She was chubby, sure enough, but scarcely a gargantuan.

But there is something weird about being so full of bile that you set up a social networking site and print out cards to humiliate other human beings. Imagine the work involved! The daily commitment to a certain very specific hatred. And the pleasure at sticking the boot into a bunch of people without copping very much in the form of censure. One of the people who sympathised with Ms Piggy tweeted: ‘Imagine the uproar if it had racist comments’ — and ungrammatical though that might be, I think it is getting close to the nub of the issue.

For as with fatness, so it is with smoking, and so increasingly with other sundry pleasures as dog ownership. On this last, thousands of restrictions have recently been imposed on where and when people can walk their dogs. It was reported that in Daventry, dog owners can now be fined £100 if they do not have those little plastic bags with them when out with their pets, regardless or not of whether the dog has crapped anywhere. Smoking has for a long time been a focus of officially sanctioned hatred, a hatred it is ok for everyone to share. A few years back I was in an open-air car park and, having got out of my car, lit a cigarette. A woman drove fully 100 yards to pull up in front of me, wind down her window and castigate me for endangering her health. It was the look of self-righteousness and jubilation on her face that will stay with me. She was yearning to be transgressed, to have someone she could spew her bile upon.

The post-Marxist Slovene philosopher Slavoj Zizek suggests that this almost unquenchable desire for the punishment or ‘shaming’ of others devolves from the fact that we are no longer allowed to be racist or sexist or homophobic, or cis-sexist. But with these conduits for our loathing excised, something needs to take their place. A sort of Quantity Theory of Hatred, then.

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Show comments
  • Fencesitter

    Zizek’s suggestion sounds semi-plausible, but I suspect Jon Ronson’s most recent book would get you closer to the truth. Which reminds me – I need to finish reading it!

  • Guest 1

    Ten miles a day, and you’re still a tad tubby? You must really nosh.

    • rodliddle

      a l c o h o l

      • Guest 1

        Ah, liquid nosh.
        Also, sorry to disappoint, but here, in Coventry, we’re well over the 14st mark.

      • Sanctimony

        Spot on, Rod !

        A couple of Weetabix with low-fat milk and then the midday urge for a couple of sherbets… a bottle of Sauvignon Blanc lumping about 800 calories upon one’s overburdened frame and the promise of a 2 mile walk back from the pub evaporating into the subsequent return shortly on a flimsy excuse to retrieve one’s spectacles and there’s the 2500 calorie demolition derby on the liver and a massive step towards obesity….

        I have a friend and ex fellow toper who took himself off to a Boer rehab clinic in South Africa; shelved out £ 30,000, and returned, cured and now proselytises to all of us soaks about the dangers of drink and the inner contentment he has found.

        This was remarkable in that while he was drying out his wife bolted with his best friend who is an even bigger pisshead than he was …

        • She (the wife) must be a right old sot, not to say that other word which starts with an S and rhymes with bag and has an L in it.

      • Harry Pond

        It is the booze, plain and simple, especially after the age of 35 or so.

      • jennybloggs

        Cut down or give up and weight will float off.

  • davidshort10

    It’s funny how car drivers think smoking endangers health but that their carbon monoxide does not. Is it because smoke is visible whereas exhaust fumes are not?

  • Craig Macleod

    Neither Paisley nor Oban are in the North of Scotland you monumental bell-end.

    • ill-liberal

      But they are north of Coventry and Sheffield, which is what the suggestion in the article is. The sub heading has nothing to do with it, you monumental bell-end.

  • Badger

    Handing out insulting cards to strangers seems like a request for a smack in the mouth.

    • hedgemagnet

      The thing is, they’re specifically targeting women, who as a group are highly unlikely to punch the twonks.

    • IainRMuir

      They’d have to catch you first.

      • Badger

        Just be careful they don’t have a slim aggressive friend.

  • Noa

    Under 14 stone Rod? I dream of that. Still I live in the north of England, drive my car down the hall to the letter box and eat chips, so I’m pixie-sized compared to the fast-larding native and eastern european women I pass on the high street.

  • Mary Ann

    Being fat may cost the NHS more but it saves money on the pension, bit like smoking.

  • Max07

    Unfortunately it seems that the ‘Overweight Haters’ are unable to spell the word ‘beautiful’ correctly. Perhaps the fatties should get together and hand out hate cards to people who can’t spell.

    • tjamesjones

      great idea!

  • Mc

    “The post-Marxist Slovene philosopher Slavoj Zizek suggests that…”

    Liddle must be the first person to have understood anything that Zizek has said or written.

  • Morris Jasper

    Petit bourgeois mores in one hand & Slavoj Zizek in the other. I have a feeling the locals would keep you running quite a bit, t’up North.

  • Mongo

    if we’re looking from a purely economic perspective, overeating, drinking and smoking should be heartily encouraged because they save the NHS millions in the long run from premature deaths

    Experts agree it’s the ageing (and rapidly increasing) population that will bankrupt the NHS

    eat your heart out

  • Crusty Bufton

    I have not been blessed with one of these cards. Maybe that is because as well as being fat I am large and violent. Bring it on skinny.

  • Woman In White

    I’m not violent, but my reaction to this sort of hateful bigotry likely would be.

    Not only is there a growing opinion among doctors that what’s currently defined as “normal weight” is actually underweight compared to an actual medical objectivity about what constitutes a healthy weight — ; — and not only is the weight that individuals tend towards naturally a variable, not a constant ; but the causes of being overweight are numerous, sometimes completely beyond people’s control, and the self-satisfied morons who hand these cards out to people that they hate because of their own vile prejudice are deserving of the very opprobrium that they seek to impose on others.

    At the end of one 500-mile hike I did, I weighed *more* than when I started. The 750-mile hike I did last year, and the 1500-2000 miles I walked during that 12-month period, had little truly lasting effect.

    Diets alone will often just cause malnutrition, physical activity has a variable effect, and any physical handicap at all, no matter how “minor” can completely prevent one’s ideal weight loss regimen.

    These people would do well to start engaging in a campaign to rid themselves of the fat that they have inside their own skulls.

    • A real liberal

      More laughing out loud. What a delightfully risible post. For a moment I thought it was serious….

      • Sanctimony

        It was dead serious, mate… There is nothing that the Woman in White says that is frivolous… there is absolutely zilch sense of humour in any of her pronouncements….

        One can only hope… and assume… that these route marches she undertook had an element of pelegrinage and that on arriving at, say, Santiago de Compostela she received some spiritually-enhancing recognition of her fortitude and devotion from Saint James…

        In my early middle-age my teenage sons used to frogmarch me around the high Alps on touring skis and I used to curse the days that I (presumably) had conceived them, but I doff my cap to this remarkable woman who, taking breath from her verbal assaults on all the heretics on this site, has found the energy and strength to stomp from the equivalent of Peckham Rye to Jerusalem on her tiny, but perfectly-formed trotters…

        • Woman In White

          Monomaniac troll.

          • A real liberal

            Try to be happy.

          • Sanctimony

            That would be sinful…

        • A real liberal

          Thanks for the advice. My mistake. Perhaps Woman in White is the sort of sad, lonely and unattractive harpy who yells abuse from the back of the Question Time audience. Oh well.

    • What absolute revisonist twaddle. What is describes as normal weight is now underweight is it? Nonsense. I remember the 1950s and the 1970s and have stacks of photographs of people as they were then. They were vastly thinner than people are now. The cause of over-weight is mostly about the massive portion sizes we eat now and the lower output of physical effort we accept these days, but mostly just food and we are all doing it. People like you who try to suggest that we should all call ‘fat’ the new normal are lying to yourselves and everyone else. We KNOW the terrible effects on health of obesity and doctors see it every day. Stop lying to yourself and eat less. It works, albeit slowly.

    • Eat less and stop talking nonsense. If you gained weight on the Camino you were travelling by bus between stops and eating like a hog. I did the Camino Frances and ate pretty well and I lost 25 pounds. I don’t see how you could have gained weight walking probably 15 to 20 miles a day unless you were eating and drinking like a Roman emperor and his wife. Walking even 15 miles a day for an average weight man would burn 1500 Kcalories and for a woman about 1200. If you ate about 2500 calories you ought to be losing a pound every three days. You must have been consuming massive amounts of food and or alcohol.

  • Liberanos

    Rod, have you never seen a 20-stone labourer? Forget the exercise. Fat is food.

    • Johnnydub

      Absdolutely. As is the mantra in my local gym – “you can’t out-train a bad diet.”

  • A real liberal

    ‘…panting like a recently gassed badger’. Oh the unexpected joy of laughing out loud in a public place.

  • StephanieJCW

    The science and studies apparently disagree. Fat shaming doesn’t tend to work. People tend to eat more in response (as an emotional response.)

    The Overweight Haters are a bunch of cowards though aren’t they. They will always target women, not the 6ft 4 inch fat bloke. Will they also be handing out those cards to rich people using the same logic?

  • Maureen Fisher

    Whenever I see a 15 stone person waddling towards the space next to me on public transport, I am filled with fear and dread as I know I will have to give up half my own seat to accommodate the large bulk and the mounds of flesh spilling out beside me. It doesn’t surprise me that these cards are being handed out on public transport.

    • Sanctimony

      Your comment is misguided…

      Take the average international rugby team where the average weight of the players is about 16 and a half stones and yet they have a minimal body fat ratio and all are supremely fit.

      When one of these hunks next approaches you on public transport and your morbid phobia rears up, you might like to just stand up and let your feet take the weight… I have been told that standing, rather than sitting, is great for weight loss

      • fundamentallyflawed

        Indeed. I weigh 19 1/2 stone and am undoubtedly overweight yet to get down to 15 stone would require amputation of an appendage….

        • Sanctimony

          Start chopping, mate !

      • Maureen Fisher

        I can’t remember the last time I saw a muscular rugby player using public transport – some kind of straw man you’ve brought in there. As I use public transport frequently in the rush hour and would prefer to sit rather than stand if I get a seat, I would like a whole seat to myself not half a seat. Perhaps you could direct your advice to the fatsos who are taking up half of my seat to stand and let their feet take the weight. It would be most welcome. Or perhaps you’re merely trolling.

    • Eurocentric

      For fatphobia, try Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT). It does wonders for all irrational fears.
      Do you do the same, I wonder, whenever a man plonks himself next to you and spreads his legs three feet apart? There are also the women with the suitcase size handbags digging into your ribs. Care to hand all these folks a card ?

      • Maureen Fisher

        I haven’t handed anyone a card. You can bury your head in the sand all you like but obesity is a major drain on our health service as is smoking.

    • Eurocentric

      For fatphobia, try Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT). It does wonders for all irrational fears.
      Do you do the same, I wonder, whenever a man plonks himself next to you and spreads his legs three feet apart? There are also the women with the suitcase size handbags digging into your ribs. Care to hand all these folks a card ?

  • William Brown

    Oh no. I’ve just snorted loudly, in public. Thanks Rod.

  • ohforheavensake

    Y’know, if you want to lose weight, cutting out the booze’d be a good thing. Might improve your writing too.

    • davidofkent

      Has it helped yours?

    • Sanctimony

      Smug git !

  • davidofkent

    Life has changed so much over the past fifty years that now many (or perhaps most) families rely on manufactured food of one type or another, rather than cooking from basic ingredients. The food manufacturers are primarily to blame for the rise in obesity because of the large amounts of sugar and fat that they add to their food to make it appealing. Obviously, people are at fault for eating it, but it’s not an easy business choosing food carefully if you don’t want to cook in the old-fashioned way. Giving up take-aways and MacDonalds would be a good start, and stopping this constant grazing on high-calorie treats would help. A sugar tax won’t work because the usual suspects will simply claim that the government is attacking ‘the poor’. Fat-shaming in a more gentle way (a quiet word in the ear from a friend/family?) is probably the only way. Young, Eastern European women are not fat when they get here. The rich in the West are not fat. There is a clue there.

    • Tom M

      I was present some time ago when Prue Leith gave a presentation to the local FSB. At the time she told us, she was on some Government quango that decided the shape and size of affordable housing. She was aghast that the current designs had no place for a cooker in the kitchen. The micro-wave being the cooking utensil of choice. Gone was the communal dining space with the hatch through to the kitchen. Meals on laps in front of the television replaced all that.
      I disagree that “many families rely on manufactured food”. I would say that they choose manufactured food. Wherever they go to buy their manufactured food there will be, in all likelihood, a vegetable counter. Better eating and considerable cheaper as well. But everybody wants the convenience of manufactured food.

      • davidofkent

        Yes I agree. We were much healthier when we cooked and ate ‘meat and two veg’ for our main meals – and no snacking between meals.

  • rtj1211

    Are you saying you’ve been kicked out the London media and will have to work for the chavs at the BBC in Manchester or something, Mr Liddle?

    Good gracious me, I believe the Labour Party can always do with a good man in Oldham……they’ve got a football team you’d enjoy watching after your torture at Millwall after all……and I’m sure Paul Scholes will have huge compliments to pay you about your overall fitness…….

  • jim

    “….. this almost unquenchable desire for the punishment or ‘shaming’ of others devolves from the fact that we are no longer allowed to be racist or sexist or homophobic, or cis-sexist….”
    Well there’s your answer.The old ways were best.

  • Clive

    I’m a fat ugly human being – about 21 1/2 stone. I’m vegan and teetotal (I became vegetarian in 1978; vegan in 1989 and completely teetotal in 1976) and I exercise every weekday morning for 35 mins on an exercise bike or rowing machine (a week at a time on each).

    I am a fat ugly human being who has over-exercised so I get atrial fibrillation. I use a pulse watch to make sure I don’t overdo it but I exercise to that limit. I also do the 5 and 2 thing. The 2 are Mondays and Thursdays when I eat 600 cals or less so Tuesdays and Fridays on the exercise machines I’m close to fainting sometimes.

    Still, I am a fat ugly human being resigned to the fact of my inferiority. I can see that being a fat ugly human being reduces my worth in this society and makes me a burden to others. I am also 68 so I have robbed the younger generation of what would have been their wealth – even greater reason to loathe myself.

    As a fat ugly human being who has robbed the young, etc. I have no right to any opinion on anything yet I think of Muslims as human beings like me even though I know that many disagree – including the attractively thin (geography allowing) Mr Liddle. I can only apologise for whining this misanthropic (to people who are not Muslims) opinion yet I feel that I must.

    As a fat ugly Muslim-approving human being that has robbed the young etc. in 1984/5 I lost 173 pounds but I regained it all and more over the following 5-10 years. That happens, you know. Mainly it was from working long hours thus not exercising or eating properly. I retired just before my 68th birthday so I have no excuse now.

    So if anyone wants to hand me a card, they’d better have a big fûcking card and a face that can take a punch.

    • Johnny Foreigner

      Jesus, having read this, I agree. When are you gonna go?

    • Johnny Foreigner

      Jesus, having read this, I agree. When are you gonna go?

    • Mongo

      if all of that’s true, I think you’re going about losing weight the wrong way

    • You should be melted down and be turned into bio diesel so I can drive further and gas teh planet with NOX.

  • misomiso

    Try British Military Fitness. It’s really good, you can do it three times a week and you won’t have to move up North!

    Also, give up booze for two months and watch the pounds melt off.

    • Clive

      In 1975 I gave up smoking – I smoked a lot and I put on about 3 stone in the following year even though I was already about 18 stone.

      So I gave up drinking in 1976. This because mostly I drank huge amounts of beer, hardly any wine or spirits.

      It didn’t make a blind bit of difference. I eventually stopped the upward trend by controlling food intake.

  • Adam Bromley

    Really Rod, come on? Were you really in two minds about whether it is acceptable for someone to hand a card to a perfect stranger on public transport with abusive comments? And Zizek, as always is talking nonsense, albeit verbose, intellectual nonsense. Most people don’t have stored up hatred that they need to offload. But there’s a minority of people who love telling others what to do or get a kick out of abusing them. The answer is to tell them, with a polite smile, to get a life and learn some manners.

  • Tamerlane

    I don’t mind fat people so long as they don’t go to Cooper’s Hill on spring Bank Holiday. Then I mind them. A lot.

    • Todd Unctious

      Cheese rolling idiot.

  • Mr. Bernard Wijeyasingha

    “How they keep so thin and affluent is a mystery to me, because I almost never see them out exercising when I’m panting like a recently gassed badger,” Quoting the article

    Well they maybe staying slim and trim because unlike the less fortunate they have private exercise rooms in their multi million dollar homes.

    Another simple fact of life is eat only to satiate your hunger
    Never munch between meals. that slight sensation of hunger before the next meal is good.

    What you eat is equally important. more ‘white” colored things like pasta have a lot of calories. One can use Olive oil instead of butter to fry.

    Ever wonder why the portions in an expensive restaurant are so small outside of the outrageous prices? because those who can afford to go to those restaurants eat that much of food. they seldom gorge. The restuarant saves money by satiating the appetite of the customer and not indulging in offering massive amounts of food that the customer refuses to eat.

    • Mongo

      the fact is, losing weight is only 10% exercise, and 90% what, and how much, you eat.

      exercise is always good of course, but it’s not nearly as important to weight loss as they claim

      • Callipygian

        I’ve seen the percentages quoted as 20% exercise, 80% food. Who knows? And it might vary among people.

        I agree with your essential point, however. Where I think exercise is key is that it helps boost metabolism in the long run, which helps maintain the weight loss. Also, there’s ‘physical activity’ and then there’s ‘physical training’, the latter if it’s worth anything involving strength training. Muscles matter for a million reasons we don’t have time to list. And you can’t build muscles by dieting.

      • Mr. Bernard Wijeyasingha

        forgot to mention I also take a lot of vitamins. Drink a lot of water. live in a town where we have a natural (massive) underground aqueduct. Given up on soda drinks, beer, occasionally drink wine, no kind of smoking (never smoked a cigarette, but have smoked pot), tea is just black, but every now and then add milk, no sugar at all. Cereal no sugar. lots of fruit. plenty of spices. and now I do like the sensation of a touch of hunger before the next meal.

      • Sam Carmine

        Diet is extremely important, for sure. But disagree that exercise only matters 10%. More like, in order to exercise more, you have to adjust your diet to suit. Bad eating habits prevent you from getting much out of exercise- rather than exercise on it’s own not providing the benefits you want.

    • Callipygian

      Mini-munching between mini-meals might actually be a better way to keep the metabolism motoring. We’re all a bit different and have different habits & needs.

      *I* have a private exercise room (I call it my ‘studio’), and my home isn’t worth a million, never mind multi-millions. On the other hand, if it were located in England, it probably *would* be.

      There’s no advantage in using olive oil over butter. There IS a benefit in rotating the fats you use and having a little of everything. Butter is not really one fat but contains many different types of fat that are also found in different proportions in other foods. It comes pretty much direct from a cow and is therefore considered a ‘clean’ food.

      As for the customer in expensive places not wanting much: it depends. My mother was proffered a tiny plate of something (medallions? mushrooms? I don’t recall) and was so bemused by its paltriness that she called the waiter over to complain and he said that what she had was normal. She said ‘oh really’ and counted aloud in a hushed dining room the one, two, THREE morsels on her plate. After a flurry of yes madams he brought her a full complement of food. Sometimes ya just gotta insist!

      • Mr. Bernard Wijeyasingha

        I too have an exercise room in a house that is 4 thousand square feet. Yes I agree whatever helps you have a balanced healthy meal would most likely allow your own metabolism handle it. I cannot take mini munches. not anymore.

        when I was young I did three 26 mile marathons, excellent at Hatha Yoga, Calisthenics, swimming, Weight lifting, jogging. Then I had to consume a lot since I was burning a lot of calories. If not my blood sugar level would go down and I would get irritable.

        Now I am quite content in saying “no no no” than “yes yes yes” when it comes to more food.

        • Callipygian

          Good for you, mate. You know what you’re about! : )

          • Mr. Bernard Wijeyasingha

            Thanks. I shared my experience and wise enough not to judge others on how they choose to live their lives for I would not want the same done to me.

    • Maureen Fisher

      Well they probably cut out drink which Rod probably indulges in.

      • Mr. Bernard Wijeyasingha

        If the picture in the article is that of Rod then it does look like a “beer gut ” to me. In the army soldiers are told to pull in the belly and stand straight. that goes a long way in burning calories and that is posture alone.

        But with belly as seen in the picture well One suggestion is a hot tub where heavy people can exercise in water which supports their weight allowing them to move around more easily than out of water.

        • Pulling in your gut uses no extra calories – trust me. It is true. The only way to lose weight is to reduce food intake. Even Rod’s ten mile walks only consume a thousand calories. The problem is for many who try to lose weight this way is that they return from their walk starving, and think they have earned half a packet of biscuits which will almost certainly be far more calorific than the calories they burned on their walk.

          I have found that reducing carbohydrate intake and reducing portion size has been very successful in deducing my weight by ten pounds in four months. I hardly noticed the effort it took.

          An average man will use 100 calories a mile of brisk walking or 35 calories a mile of cycling to work at 12 miles an hour. One feeble rather plain biscuit will be a hundred calories. So is a single slice of bread from a large factory cut white loaf. Doorsteps of bread are obviously more. FOOD RESTRICTION is the only practical way to lose weight unless you have time to commit ridiculous amounts of time to exercising. Rod’s ten mile a day walks will take him about 2 an a half hours if he gets a good pace on. Very good for you, but on its own a slow way to lose the weight as it will if he consumes no extra food from hunger through his hard exercise, lose only two pounds a week by committing to nearly three hours of walking a day.

          • Mr. Bernard Wijeyasingha

            Pulling in your gut burns calories but not to the extent that a vigorous exercise and a proper diet would do
            When one burns calories due to exercise such as fast walking, calisthenics etc. the body continues to burn calories hours after you have stopped. That is partly due to the metabolism of the body. The heart thumping causing blood to surge and increased internal activity continues. So you may not burn as many calories when you are working out but the calories continue to burn as the body slows down.

      • Mr. Bernard Wijeyasingha

        When I was in Berkeley I lived in a house with a hot tub that would seat around 20 people. It was massive. and it allowed me to do a lot of exercises one normally finds harder outside of water.

  • Callipygian

    Thank you Rod: it’s about time that we had some genuine levity around here. ‘Perhaps their thinness is genetic, much as is their money’. Subtle, clever, knowing: if there’s ever a writer that makes me want to fawn, it’s you.

  • Jonathan Tedd

    Throw away the big screen opiate dispenser. By a dining room table. Listen to Bach, learn to sing, cook, read Rod Liddle (here, The Sun on Thursdays, Sunday Times. Go to church.

    • Texas Sunday Morning

      Was with you up until church. If I want to hear a nice middle class person tell be a mixture of comforting and terrifying lies then I’ll listen to the 6 o’clock news.

  • douglas redmayne

    I despise all of those passive aggressive fat entitled lard arsed women who take up too much room on public transport and walk too slowly. Shaming them if it works would be an example of the Big Society in action. He cosy of fatties could also be reduced if they were forced to pay for some of their own medical treatment.

    • Maureen Fisher

      I wonder if you have received the abusive messages I have when I wrote about these larde arses occupying half my seat on public transport.

      • douglas redmayne

        No but they dan be very aggressive when their selfishly indulgent ways are pointed out to them.

    • Tom Sykes

      not just women

  • Well the far left are experts on hate, since it’s the only thing that keeps them going

    • BrickinaWall

      Whereas the far right don’t hate?

      • When and where did I say that?

        • Sam Carmine

          It’s called a false equivalency, I believe. Lefties lie, distort, and project.

  • Jackthesmilingblack

    Dragging around excess weight (you guys still use stones?) puts more strain on your legs, particularly the knees. And when your knees give out you’re screwed. That OK, Mods?

  • Scrounger

    Indeed dear Rodders – but the most telling piece was the last piece – Zizeks.

    Blighty surely has the most draconian laws regulating ‘free speech’ ? So much so that should you happen to offend some ‘delicate flower’ – they can report you to the ‘Pigs’ – and those ‘Swines’ will then investigate !

    I am quite happy to admit to loathing people – generally – but know one has to be careful about those whom one would castigate.

    Signed – Northern Couch Potato !

  • If you want to lose weight, just remember that 3500 kcalories of food you DON’T eat but WOULD HAVE DONE in your normal routine, equates to one pound of lost flab. It’s easy to lose weight – no complex mumbo jumbo – you just have to EAT LESS than you need. An average man living a twentyfirst century life probably needs 2500 calories to maintain his weight and a woman probably needs 1900 calories. To lose weight we just need to have fewer – say 1500 for a man and 1200 for a woman. At that rate of consumption, the man would probably lose almost 2 pounds a week and the woman about 1 and a half pounds a week. Slow but sure is the best way because by slightly depriving yourself you have a chance of maintaining the tactic on a long term basis. Exercise is healthy, but you need a massive amount of exercise and time investment to equate to the kind of calorie consumption I have suggested here.

    • Sam Carmine

      Great comment.