Confessions of a Coronavirus vulture

The luckiest man in the world is a financier friend of mine who decided two weeks ago to wind up his hedge fund and retire (aged 50, the sod!). When he sold, the markets were about the highest they’ve ever been. By the following Monday, as the Coronavirus scare started to take hold, they’d tumbled 10 per cent; this week – thanks to the worst stock market collapse since the 2008 crash – those shares he offloaded at their peak are now worth peanuts.