Flat White

The PC monster wants to eat all the fun

24 June 2020

9:47 AM

24 June 2020

9:47 AM

Make it stop.  

Seriously… Make. It. Stop.  

Nestle is rebranding its Redskins and Chicos sweets. It reckons their names are controversial and are “out of step” with the company’s values. 

The muppets who have complained about this are the same people who will complain about white paint being racist. 

Redskins are chewy, raspberry-flavoured sweets. They are literally sugar plus flavouring, coloured pinky-red. 

Chicos are chocolate-flavoured jellies. Chico is a word you can use in Spanish to refer to children. Children like sweets. 

Really, this isn’t hard.  

“A diverse and inclusive culture is the foundation of our strength,” said Nestle in a statement, while simultaneously waving a white flag to the PC monster. “Nestle’s values are rooted in respect, and we have zero tolerance for racism or discrimination of any form. As part of this process, we are immediately renaming and redesigning a handful of local brands we have found that use stereotypes or insensitive cultural depictions.”

What’s next?  

Are marshmallows to be banned for undertones of white supremacy? 

Marshmallows only come in white and pink. Isn’t that very Anglo-Saxon? 

Are Milk Bottles lacking diversity? They only come in white.

Are Smarties offensive to people who aren’t smart? 

Are chocolate bullets still allowed – or are they deemed to be inciting violence? Perhaps they, like any talk about African gangs, are to be thrown in the bin? 

Is white chocolate offensive? Dark chocolate to be renamed?  

See, the problem? Where does this utterly insane madness end?

If your brand goes weak at the knee at the first sign of left-wing activists knocking at the door to scream “racist”, I would suggest that you have more pressing problems than the name of your confectionary.

Wake up, you morons, this is a completely calculated attack on our culture.

Stop it.  

Illustration: Twitter.

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