Flat White

Why Danandrewstan remains a disaster zone, in 15 words

25 October 2020

5:27 PM

25 October 2020

5:27 PM

Well, whaddya know? Danandrestan didn’t open up further today because of the latest clusterfuck involving its health bureaucracy, that group of special somethings responsible for more clusterfucks since March than seen at every orgy ever held during the 1000 years of the Roman Empire.

You could see it was coming as early as last Thursday as details emerged about the coronavirus cluster in Melbourne’s northern suburbs.

Even more importantly, you could see precisely who was responsible.

Four short paragraphs in an online report, less than 90 words in all, explained it perfectly:

Confusion between a family and Victoria’s Department of Health and Human Services saw a grade five student attend school before testing positive for the coronavirus.

The bungle was linked to five new cases today, with 73 close contacts identified and 400 people in isolation.

Deputy Chief Health Officer Allan Cheng said each member of the family had a different case manager, which meant they were receiving different advice.

Adding to the confusion, Professor Cheng said each member of the family was at a different stage of the isolation period.


Did you note the crucial par?

Deputy Chief Health Officer Allan Cheng said each member of the family had a different case manager, which meant they were receiving different advice.

Why? Why on God’s good earth did every single member of a family need their own case manager? Why on earth weren’t they coordinating?

That tells you absolutely everything you need to know about the incompetence, negligence and idiocy of the Andrews Government and these seven months disaster.

You don’t even need four pars.

It’s a little crude, but here’s the problem summed up in 15 words: too many bloody public servants — their heads up their arses while somehow spontaneously spouting shit.

And still the charade continues.

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