Life
Low life
‘Get ready for the stink,’ said Oscar as we walked up the concrete ramp to the entrance of the ape…
Not bloody likely
In My Fair Lady, which came out as a film in 1964, 50 years after Shaw’s Pygmalion, they decided to…
Real life
‘I’m afraid you’ve made a mistake with my council tax,’ I said to the lady at Guildford Borough Council. ‘Right,’…
Hacked off with the haka
Kingsley Amis said the most depressing words in the English language were ‘Shall we go straight in?’ — meaning no…
Why I’m backing Corbyn the Great
Comrades. I’m going to tell you why I think Jeremy Corbyn is the right person to lead this country. First…
The turf
Nobody I know has ever been interviewed by an opinion pollster. Nor do I ever encounter anybody who has won…
Parliamentary moves
With the election dominating the news, this week I focus on the strongest chess player to have entered Parliament. Marmaduke…
Question time
In Competition No. 3000 you were invited to provide an answer, in verse or prose, to a famous literary question…
2312: Bandleader
Two unclued lights form the title by which a 38 32 is commonly known. This title’s first word defines one…
2309: Complicated
Corrections of misprints in clues give TANGLED UP IN BLUE, the title of a song by Bob Dylan. Answers to…
Dear Mary
Q. I am a member of a well-known country house opera society, and I organise annual trips to performances for…
Rosé-tinted glasses
It was a typical bank holiday. Usual English weather: glorious, until you leave home without a brolly. Then fickleness supervenes…
High life
I feel like an obituary writer, what with Nick Scott, Roger Moore, Alistair Horne — all great buddies — and…
The Battle for Britain
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Low life
My latest bed partner is a seven-year-old lad. That first night we slept together in my double bed, I hardly…
Reference
When Dickens wanted to buy a house in 1837, he wrote to Richard Bentley, who had started the magazine in…
Real life
‘You’re probably excited about your new service and keen to start using it as soon as you can,’ said the…
Race, gender and a terrifying witch hunt
A leading article appeared in Nature last week in defence of intelligence research. It lamented the fact that it is…
Wild life
The guests at my brother-in-law Rick’s 70th birthday lunch party were distinguished, silver-haired, well heeled. Long before Rick rescued the…
Don’t look for any merit in meritocracy
A few years ago, someone asked me how to fix social care costs for the elderly. One eventual idea of…
Bridge
It’s the funniest bridge story I’ve heard in ages. At the recent Lady Milne championship (the women’s Home Internationals), one…
Vote Basman
To the best of my knowledge, Michael Basman is the first officially titled chess master to ever stand in a UK…
No. 459
Black to play. This position is from Mecking-Basman, Hastings 1966. How did Black make the most of his active knights?…
Bridge
The last days of May see all the ongoing tournaments coming to an end: both TGR’s and Young Chelsea’s Super…
Thoroughly modern
In 1972, in collaboration with George Botterill, two-times British champion, I published a revolutionary book on 1 … g6 which…
