They say a dog is for life, not just for Christmas. Clearly that’s another old adage Joe Biden no longer remembers, as this week his White House announced the unsanctimonious jettisoning of Major, the president’s German shepherd, in favor of Commander, a younger, friendlier pup.
“Welcome to the White House, Commander,” a tweet from the official POTUS account read. The president’s social media flacks then posted a video of the new First Dog playing with Biden. In the clip, Commander sits in order to earn a treat from the president: clearly an upgrade in the behavioral stakes.
Meet the newest Biden. pic.twitter.com/JHAbH53iRk
— President Biden (@POTUS) December 20, 2021
Major, you may recall, was a rescue taken in by the Biden family in November 2018. As Cockburn’s comrade Daniel Turner wrote, “Fifteen months after deciding to run for leader of the free world, Joe Biden at seventy-six years old concluded that was the ideal time to rescue a puppy.”
What followed is not all that surprising: Major found himself involved in what the White House euphemistically referred to as “biting incidents” with staff. You know, a little like how Joe himself inadvertently finds himself mixed up in “hair-sniffing incidents.” Who’s really to blame?
Major was carted off to doggie boot camp in an attempt to change his ways — but it seems his efforts were in vain.
“After consulting with dog trainers, animal behaviorists and veterinarians, the First Family has decided to follow the experts’ collective recommendation that it would be safest for Major to live in a quieter environment with family friends,” said Michael LaRosa, spokesperson for the First Lady.
The Bidens appear to be taking advantage of the pre-Christmas news slow-down to try and spin the rotations of the First Pet Merry-Go-Round as a feel-good story. Cockburn can’t help but wonder: Major only nipped a couple of staffers — surely Hunter’s crack-smoking, whoring and shady art dealings are more worthy of a presidential heave-ho?
To add insult to injury, next month Commander will be joined in replacing Major — by a cat.
Cockburn is surprised the Bidens are following through with the feline. In Vice President Harris, the West Wing already has an unloved mammal that doesn’t hesitate to use its claws when threatened and shows little regard for those around it — does it really need another?
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