Flat White

Get wet, end up drowned

10 May 2022

11:00 AM

10 May 2022

11:00 AM

Soggy Liberals under attack from the Climate 200 mob have no one to blame except themselves. They walked out into the tide to complain about the temperature of the water and then acted all surprised when a bloody great wave hit them in the back.

These are the Liberals who spend their time throwing shade at Blue Ribbon conservatives for abandoning the Party in favour of the ‘freedom friendly’ minors. It’s a bit of a Greta-esque ‘how dare!’ aimed at voters who wandered off when the custodians of conservationism eyed-up progressive politics and lunatic fringe activism. The Sharmas, Zimmermans, Keans, and – yes – even the Frydenbergs of Australia are miffed at the so-called ‘disloyalty’ of voters when they should concern themselves with the disloyalty of their Party’s ideology and subsequent abandonment of the principles that once made the Liberal Party a political force.

Conservative voters haven’t changed their values. The Liberal Party veered hard-left and tried to drag the electorate with it – tugging on their leashes only to discover that democracies do not always do what they are told. When voters attempted to explain this, the soggy Liberals did everything short of calling them ‘deplorables’.

When the Left started playing ‘apocalypse politics’, the Liberals had an opportunity to shift sensationalised environmentalism into a discussion about pollution, genuine preservation, and a secure energy future underpinned by nuclear. Instead of opposing what can reasonably be described as Eco-Fascism, the Liberals saw money dripping out of the sleeves of renewables billionaires and followed them home. Liberal MPs were lured closer by the creation of a ‘saviour complex’ with egos inflated to the point that they now run election campaigns that effectively say, ‘vote for me and I’ll save the whole world’.

Voters look at these half-wit deities in expensive suits with cheap smiles and dismiss them as charlatans.

For all their supposed intelligence, the Liberals haven’t worked out that you can’t out-Woke the Woke because they hail from a position of radicalisation. When politicians tell constituents that their children will die unless they cover the surface of the Earth in solar panels – don’t expect those same people to take a ‘moderate’ position. You’ve told them their children will die. Those that believe the message will take the most extreme position on offer – Teal or Green. Even the Labor Party are struggling. They played Frankenstein and created a political monster patched together from bits of Marx, Mao, Attenborough, and Dr Evil.

Australia’s federal election contains fifty shades of green – a punishing schedule of identical independents financed by the same madam. If you’re wondering how to create a Teal Independent, it’s basically a Wet Liberal left out in the sun, dripping over a Green for a while and then the resulting puddle is gathered up and given a few million dollars.


Fear is a popular flavour for politicians after Covid, but seeing as most people are bored of bat soup the Teals have re-packaged climate terror with a big smile, high fashion, and perfect quota-girl appeal.

The media spent a good ten years making the rich feel guilty for their financial success then Climate Change came along and, like every predatory cult, offered the rich a way to absolve their sins by simply throwing coins at the climate priests. Far from progressive, this is how the elite have dealt with their guilt for thousands of years; a pay-cheque to a power-hungry faith.

What are the Liberals to do about their flock converting?

Slick politicians like the Member for Wentworth, Dave Sharma, stand up and say something like, ‘I am running a sensible climate policy for businesses and the community…’ while their Climate 200 challenger shouts over the pulpit, ‘Climate justice now!!!’

Sharma has nowhere to argue from. He cannot say that there is no climate threat, because he based his reputation and policy portfolio on the climate apocalypse. If he argues for sensible climate legislation, the people he spent years educating on the coming doom accuse him of not taking the apocalypse seriously. If he comes to his senses and calls out the climate cult as nothing but globalist scam artists, he will quite rightly be shouted down as a liar – either he lied then or he is lying now. It is an ideological prison of his own making locked by a political class uneducated in the politics of fear. Sharma and his ilk believe that they can manipulate raw human emotion into an election victory, but there is a good reason their historical political betters shied away from fear-mongering – it’s dangerous and unpredictable.

The Liberals have created an unwinnable position for themselves. Wealthy activist businessmen who stand to profit from Climate Change policies – particularly in the sale and manufacture of renewable energy – have sensibly thrown a small fortune at the alter of Climate 200, knowing they’ll clean up a large fortune in business deals once the Teal Shirts hand wave public money in their direction. If the Greens chip in with their ‘tax the rich!’ mantra, well – all the better for the Wentworth and Warringah electorates. They’ll tell themselves that the huge tax bills are a sort of deserved punishment for enjoying their mansions with heated swimming pools, five luxury cars, and trips to Europe every year. Too bad for their neighbours in the next electorate living off packet soup and public transport, unable to turn the aircon on. Eh, those anti-science Nazis probably deserve it for criticising Big Pharma and refusing to give up their rights for the greater good.

Are these charlatans saving the planet? No. But by the time voters work it out, it’ll be time for another election with a different apocalypse.

Apocalypse politics is the cheapest line out there. They are the fear-merchants of the West who wander around scaring children and fools into believing the world is going to end unless they vote for whichever flavour of salvation is on trend. It’s akin to making a sacrifice – an ‘easy’ fix to a life of guilt – toss your old Liberals into the volcano and the climate gods will reward you with perfect beach weather forever.

Wet Liberals paint themselves as the refined elite – the upper class of conservative politics that don’t subscribe to old-fashioned ideas such as loyalty, service, fiscal responsibility, liberty, free speech, and practical infrastructure. They would much rather walk politics all the way back, long before science, to an era where powerful men controlled the weather with public fear.

The problem with wets taking up space in the ‘broad church’ is that their existence paints factional Blue Ribbon rivals as ‘evil, regressive, out-of-date, and anti-science’. In essence, the moderates drive support away from good Blue Ribbon seats – de-stabilising essential power structures for forming government, and at the same time run a promotional election campaign for the Labor, Greens, and Climate 200 opposition by telling the world how great their promises are. Those that believe them see a divided, warring Liberal Party and vote for something else, while those who think they’re full of crap vote for conservative minor parties in protest. The Liberal Party lose votes on both sides.

Conservatism will survive, but what about the Liberal Party?

Alexandra Marshall is an independent writer. If you would like to support her work, shout her a coffee over at donor-box.

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