Dear Mary: How can I stop other diners eating my chips?
Q. My husband and I are committed Brexiteers. For many years we have regularly enjoyed friendly bridge evenings with a…
Dear Mary: How can I hang out with smokers at parties without freezing?
Q. As a young woman I tend not to wear that much to social events in the evening, but I…
When a footman’s home is his castle
My own love for this memoir may be all to do with snobbery and self-identification. Moreover, I’ve always thought a…
Dear Mary, from Joan Collins: How do I stop fans asking for selfies in the powder room?
From Dame Joan CollinsQ. Invariably, when I escape to the ladies’ room or powder room or restroom (whatever the current…
Dear Mary: What can we do about our son’s girlfriend’s appalling table manners?
Q. My son has a girlfriend who we like but who has appalling table manners. They come to stay most…
Dear Mary: Why does my feminist friend always expect me to pay for dinner?
Q. One of my very best female friends has got into the habit of lecturing me on gender equality, in…
Dear Mary: How do I stop getting lumbered with the washing up on weekends away?
Q. A friend, who is very careful with his money, occasionally invites a group of six to eight out to…
Dear Mary: How do I stop my husband eating everything in the fridge?
Q. A friend of a friend has an apartment in Venice. I would like to commiserate with her about the…
Dear Mary: What should I do about a Lib Dem friend who can no longer take a joke?
Q. I sent a WhatsApp message to a Lib Dem friend of 15 years. ‘How are you finding being a…
Dear Mary: how can I stop my dad treating my mum like a slave?
Q. Dad takes an old-fashioned approach to marriage: I have never seen him clear his plate and he does not…
Dear Mary: Is my brother being gaslighted by his boss?
Q. My brilliant brother, who graduated last year, could find nowhere to live in London so we were all delighted…
Dear Mary: Do I have a moral duty to allow Brexit chat at supper parties?
Q. I’ve been having friends to supper for many decades. Although I say it myself, these gatherings have often been…
Dear Mary: How can I stop my neighbour making weird noises when he exercises in the garden?
Q. I sing soprano in a small church choir, ten to 12 singers. The woman I am placed next to…
Dear Mary: How can I tell a man at yoga class to cover up?
Q. My sister runs a yoga school and a middle-aged gentleman has joined. Although she is delighted to encourage male…
The men I’ve groped (including Boris)
Charlotte Edwardes reports that Boris put his hand on her leg during lunch 20 years ago. Full disclosure, I put…
Dear Mary: How do I cope with university flatmates who can’t cook?
Q. For many years I employed around 60 people with whom I worked in an open-plan office. I moved on from…
Dear Mary: Is it OK for a couple to ask us to contribute to their savings as a wedding gift?
Q. Every three months or so my PA blossoms into a great beauty for a couple of weeks, then has…
I was a Remainer – but I now want no deal
When I told two neighbours that I had become a no-deal Brexiter they physically recoiled from me. ‘You can’t.’ ‘But…
Dear Mary: Can I ask my vegan friend to buy eggs and bacon when I stay with her?
Q. The other day a dear friend rang from her car with all the time in the world to burn…
Dear Mary: How do we explain being in Jeffrey Epstein’s little black book?
Q. We often have friends coming to stay before (and after) we all head off for Glyndebourne, a 20-minute drive…
Dear Mary: How much should I tip a black cab driver?
Q. We have near neighbours in the country with whom I would not wish to fall out for all sorts…
Dear Mary: What do you do when your hostess licks your spoon?
Q. I have happily overcome many moments of diplomatic and social challenge, but was stumped by the case of the…
Dear Mary: How can my son tell if his cleaner is stealing from him?
Q. What is your view on emailed vs handwritten thank-yous? During my recent travels around pre-Brexit Europe I stayed in…
Dear Mary: How can I politely turn down friends’ sponsorship requests?
Q. I want my guests to feel welcome when they stay with us and certainly don’t want to nag them.…
Dear Mary: How can I deal with overly demonstrative colleagues?
Q. A friend constantly walks around with his bootlaces undone. His wife declines to nag him on the grounds she…