Competition
‘Merrie sing Rishi!’: variations on ‘Sumer is icumen in’
In Competition No. 3154 you were invited to supply your own variations on the medieval round ‘Sumer is icumen in’.…
‘Your guts will form a stinky pool’: Roald Dahl explains Covid-19 to children
In Competition No. 3153 you were invited to recruit a well-known children’s writer to explain Covid-19 to their young audience.…
The pleasure and pain of staycations
In Competition No. 3152 you were invited to supply a poem about the joys — or otherwise — of the…
Famous writers get to grips with DIY
In Competition No. 3151 you were invited to imagine famous authors reflecting on their struggles with DIY. Highlights in a…
Herculean sonnets
In Competition No. 3150 you were invited to submit a sonnet describing one of the labours of Hercules. This challenge…
‘Around the House in 80 Days’ and other titles for lockdown
In Competition No. 3149 you were invited to tweak an existing book or poem title for lockdown and provide an…
Authors making sneaky appearances in their own novels
In Competition No. 3148 you were asked to imagine what the result might have been had a well-known writer slipped…
How famous writers do social isolation
In Competition No. 3147 you were invited to submit tips on social isolation in the style of a well-known writer.…
Spectator competition winners: poems about the goats of Llandudno
In Competition No. 3146 you were invited to submit a poem about the goats of Llandudno, who recently ran amok…
Competition winners: Clerihews on Spectator contributors
In Competition No. 3145, to mark the 10,000th issue of The Spectator, you were invited to submit clerihews (two couplets,…
Spectator competition winners: Pangrams in six lines
In Competition No. 3144 you were invited to submit a poem, six lines at most, containing all the letters of…
Spectator competition winners: Love in the Time of Covid-19
In Competition No. 3143, a nod to García Márquez’s 1985 novel, you were invited to submit a short story entitled…
TripAdvisor reviews — with added spice
In Competition No. 3142 you were invited to supply a review on TripAdvisor that has been spiced up with a…
Songs to wash your hands by
In Competition No. 3141, you were invited to submit a song we cansing instead of ‘Happy Birthday’ during hand-washing. Congratulations…
The secret lives of poets
In Competition No. 3140 you were invited to submit a poem in the style of a famous poet in which…
Spectator competition winners: Grave thoughts
In Competition No. 3139 you were invited to submit a four-line verse epitaph for a well-known person, living or dead.…
Spectator competition winners: lines on a young lady’s Instagram
In Competition No. 3138 you were invited to submit a poem entitled ‘Lines on a Young Lady’s Instagram’. Thanks to…
By George
In Competition No. 3137, to mark the 70th anniversary of George Orwell’s death, you were invited to submit a short…
3136: Love me don't
In Competition No. 3136 you were invited to submit a lonely hearts ad guaranteed to send those looking for love…
Just the job
In Competition No. 3135 you were invited to submit an application letter for a job at No. 10 from a fictional…
Cat call
In Competition No. 3134 you were invited to submit a poem featuring one of T.S. Eliot’s practical cats getting to…
Competition: Food glorious food
In Competition No. 3133 you were invited to provide a passage about food written in the style of a well-known…
Bizarre books
In Competition No. 3132 you were invited to submit an extract from one of the following books: Noah Gets Naked:…
You must remember this
In Competition No. 3131 you were invited to submit a poem beginning ‘Yes. I remember…’ This challenge was suggested by…
Trochaics
In Competition No. 3130 you were invited to add to Sam Leith’s lines about Boris Johnson, written in the metre…
