Competition
Spectator competition winners: ‘O scintillate, bright orb celestial! Gleam’ (‘Twinkle, twinkle, Little Star’)
In Competition No. 3226, you were invited to rewrite, in pompous and prolix style, any well-known simple poem. The seed…
Dominic Raab’s ‘Nightmare Song’
In Competition No. 3225, you were invited to provide a version of the Lord Chancellor’s ‘Nightmare Song’ from Iolanthe for…
Spectator competition winners: tourist misinformation
In Competition No. 3224, you were invited to submit snippets of misleading advice either for tourists visiting Britain or for…
Spectator competition winners: Beano acrostics
In Competition No. 3223, you were invited to supply an acrostic poem in which the first letter of each line,…
Spectator competition winners: dystopian animal stories
In Competition No. 3222, you were invited to supply a dystopian short story that incorporates as many collective nouns for…
Spectator competition winners: odes on the Marble Arch Mound
In Competition No. 3221, you were invited to submit an ode on the Marble Arch Mound. The 25 metre-high artificial…
Spectator competition winners: Newly discovered short stories by poets
In Competition No. 3220, you were invited to supply a newly discovered short story by a well-known 19th- or 20th-century…
Clerihews on scientists
In Competition No. 3219, you were invited to supply clerihews on well-known scientists, past and present. The subject of the…
Spectator competitions winners: W.S. Gilbert makes a ham sandwich
In Competition No. 3218, you were invited to supply a recipe as it might have been written by the author…
Spectator competition winners: ‘Why must it always be tomato soup?’
In Competition No. 3217, you were invited to supply a poem that begins or ends with the line ‘Why must…
Spectator competition winners: Bridget Jones’s Bible
In Competition No. 3216, you were invited to retell a well-known biblical story in a secular style that would enhance…
Spectator competition winners: In memoriam Geronimo the alpaca
In Competition No. 3215, you were -invited to supply a poem about Geronimo the alpaca. The camelid’s fate was finally…
Spectator competition winners: the Mona Lisa has her say
In Competition No. 3214, you were invited to choose a well-known painted portrait and let the subject speak for itself,…
Spectator competition winners: Villanelles after Elizabeth Bishop
In Competition No. 3213 you were invited to submit a villanelle whose first line is: ‘The art of [insert gerund…
Spectator competition winners: Mrs Malaprop turns tour guide
In Competition No. 3212 you were invited to provide a spiel that a well-known character from the field of fact…
Spectator competition winners: Nursery rhymes for the pandemic
In Competition No. 3211 you were invited to submit a nursery rhyme inspired by the pandemic. When I set this…
Spectator competition winners: poems inspired by the phonetic alphabet
In Competition No. 3210, you were invited to provide a poem or a piece of prose containing words from the…
Spectator competition winners: Shakespeare’s Seven Ages of a Tory MP
In Competition No. 3209, you were invited to provide Shakespeare’s Seven Ages of a Tory MP. Inspiration for this challenge…
Spectator competition winners: W.S. Gilbert’s guide to wedded bliss
In Competition No. 3208, you were invited to submit a recipe for marital bliss on behalf of an author of…
Spectator competition winners: Donald Trump writes a political thriller
In Competition No. 3207, you were invited to supply an extract from a thriller, written by a well-known politician, that…
Sonnets on the universe
In Competition No. 3206, you were invited to supply a sonnet on the universe. The late Frank Kermode reckoned that…
A literary-critical analysis of Abba’s ‘Waterloo’
In Competition No. 3205, you were invited to supply a rigorous literary-critical analysis of a well-known pop song. Thanks to…
Spectator competition winners: Rondeaus on a summery theme
In Competition No. 3204, you were invited to supply a rondeau with a summery theme. The best-known English rondeau is…
Extracts from Shakespeare’s newly discovered play, Charles III
In Competition No. 3203, you were invited to supply an extract from the newly discovered Shakespeare play Charles III. I…
P.G. Wodehouse’s Aunts Among the Chickens
In Competition No. 3202, you were invited to replace the word ‘love’ in a well-known book title of your choice…
