‘Hell, this is a dead spot, I’ll just tell you what I was going to text you.’

Text

28 February 2015 9:00 am

‘I’ve found you a trolley.’

Trolley

28 February 2015 9:00 am

‘We were made for each other, Susan.’

Made

28 February 2015 9:00 am

‘Excuse Melanie, she’s come out without her mobile.’

Mobile

28 February 2015 9:00 am

‘Take no notice — he lives in a fantasy world.’

Fantasy

28 February 2015 9:00 am

‘To be honest, usually both members of the couple are alive.’

Alive

28 February 2015 9:00 am

Farms

28 February 2015 9:00 am

List

28 February 2015 9:00 am

‘Cut! Can you strut and fret less!’

Strut

21 February 2015 9:00 am

‘Stop! Do not attempt to move him to a different postcode!’

Postcode

21 February 2015 9:00 am

‘Which is your best nightmare?’

Nightmare

21 February 2015 9:00 am

‘Couldn’t you stop growing your beard now, Roger?’

Beard

21 February 2015 9:00 am

Before you proceed, Spirit, I must tell you that this conversation may be recorded for training purposes.’

Spirit

21 February 2015 9:00 am

Ceasefire

21 February 2015 9:00 am

‘I don’t know for certain but she could be the god of multitasking.’

Multi

21 February 2015 9:00 am

Benefits

21 February 2015 9:00 am

Lion

21 February 2015 9:00 am

Documentary

21 February 2015 9:00 am

Invest

21 February 2015 9:00 am

‘Here comes the private jet.’

Jet

21 February 2015 9:00 am

‘We need to be careful. It could be full of election promises.’

Promises

21 February 2015 9:00 am

‘Before I begin, has everyone taken their statin?’

Statin

21 February 2015 9:00 am

‘It’s wonderful to see them behaving naturally in the wild rather than being forced to perform in captivity.’

Clowns

21 February 2015 9:00 am

Isis

21 February 2015 9:00 am

‘The coast is clear, Cap’n, I think we’re safe to board her.’

Pirates

21 February 2015 9:00 am