‘Famine, meet wastage.’

Tesco

26 October 2013 9:00 am

Cannabis

26 October 2013 9:00 am

‘You’ll have to excuse Ken, he gets argumentative when he’s sober.’

Tea

26 October 2013 9:00 am

‘There’s nothing worth watching on this side either.’

Otherside

26 October 2013 9:00 am

Foodbank

26 October 2013 9:00 am

‘My new boyfriend is just perfect — we find the same things depressing’

Boyfriend

26 October 2013 9:00 am

The economy is definitely picking up. That was just a soup kitchen six months ago.’

Foodbank2

26 October 2013 9:00 am

Streetview

26 October 2013 9:00 am

‘...hammer, chisel, screwdriver, spanner, saw, screws, nuts, bolts...Now all I need is a job.’

Hammer

26 October 2013 9:00 am

‘Would you mind if I used your bathroom?’

Bathroom

26 October 2013 9:00 am

‘That’s the visitor centre finished. When do we start building the actual monument?’

Stonehenge

26 October 2013 9:00 am

‘Next week we’re culling frackers.’

Frackers

26 October 2013 9:00 am

‘I’d like to have her legs and she’d like to have my breasts.’

Surgery

26 October 2013 9:00 am

Bouncers

26 October 2013 9:00 am

‘I think you’ve turned the clocks a tad too far back, Charles.’

Relax

26 October 2013 9:00 am

Tunnel

26 October 2013 9:00 am

Baby

26 October 2013 9:00 am

Print

19 October 2013 9:00 am

Dog

19 October 2013 9:00 am

‘The foxes round here are so urban that they go to the country at weekends.’

Foxes

19 October 2013 9:00 am

‘Luckily, we’ll all be wearing hi-viz jackets.’

Blackout

19 October 2013 9:00 am

Modern wardrobe malfunction

Wardrobe

19 October 2013 9:00 am

‘I’m game if you are.’

Game

19 October 2013 9:00 am

‘Three bills and a sample of shampoo — you’ll have to do better than this now I’m a shareholder.’

Post

19 October 2013 9:00 am

‘I won’t believe he’s a terrorist until he starts reading the Guardian.’

Homeland

19 October 2013 9:00 am