Subscriber Only

Friedrich Nietzche [Photo: Roger-Viollet/Shutterstock]

The divine comedy of Friedrich Nietzsche

26 October 2019 9:00 am

I’ve come back to the empty house for the second time in the six weeks since my mother died. The…

[Photo: Alasdair Thomson]

Was our nut-infested plane a death trap?

26 October 2019 9:00 am

‘This is your captain speaking, welcome aboard this flight to London Gatwick. As there is a passenger on our flight…

Why Simone de Beauvoir is my kind of woman

19 October 2019 9:00 am

New York   A strange thing happened to me here in the Bagel last week. Having read the recent review…

The truth behind those Airbnb snaps

19 October 2019 9:00 am

Catriona and I had agreed that a terrace for smoking, eating, drinking and painting was a necessity rather than a…

In the middle of our holiday came the phone call I was dreading

19 October 2019 9:00 am

Just before Tara left us, the old chestnut mare used to enjoy standing at the bottom gate watching the sun…

Why Roy Cohn is not one of the world’s most evil men

12 October 2019 9:00 am

New York   The Roy Cohn documentary Bully. Coward. Victim: the Story of Roy Cohn was successfully screened at the…

What had the chambermaid made of my penis vacuum pump?

12 October 2019 9:00 am

Fumbling outside my door in dripping swimming trunks for my room key, I was hailed cheerily by the maid from…

My bid to boost my carbon footprint

12 October 2019 9:00 am

Inspired by Harry and Meghan I decided to get on a plane. I hadn’t been anywhere for so long it…

What you can tell about a man from his choice of underwear

5 October 2019 9:00 am

New York It’s Indian summertime and the living is easy. There hasn’t been a cloud above the Bagel for two…

Will mindfulness turn me into a Remainer?

5 October 2019 9:00 am

Mindfulness at our all-inclusive Turkish beach resort began at 11 o’clock. Our mindfulness teacher was a tiny, smiley, flexible-looking woman…

Should I return to the land of my Italian ancestors?

5 October 2019 9:00 am

When I was growing up, my Italian grandfather was my favourite person. He taught me to play a mean game…

An elegy for New York

28 September 2019 9:00 am

New York The master of the love letter to New York, E.B. White, eloquently described the city as a place…

Why Sodom and south Devon are a million miles apart

28 September 2019 9:00 am

We gathered around in the sunshine and watched the coffin being lowered into the freshly dug trench. Stratifications visible on…

The rise of the Brexitainers

28 September 2019 9:00 am

The Union Jack is flying on the front of my house. After a long discussion with the local council, planning…

[Photo: by-studio]

Why I prefer cows to humans

21 September 2019 9:00 am

Gstaad   The cows are coming down, the cows are coming down, and I’m off to the Bagel. My Swiss…

[Photo: Lovattpics]

Semi-recluse (me) seeks dilapidated cottage on Dartmoor to rent

21 September 2019 9:00 am

So now I must find somewhere else to put my books and live sometimes. Dartmoor, I thought: one of the…

Do I need planning permission to fly a Union Flag on my house? [Photo: coldsnowstorm]

What Brexiteers can teach Remoaners about good manners

21 September 2019 9:00 am

‘If we are going to Westminster to riot,’ I told my Brexit-voting friends over dinner at the Thai restaurant at…

Remembering Tim Hoare – a man like no other

14 September 2019 9:00 am

He was a Falstaff in his drinking and in his celebration of life, but his greatness lay in his friendships.…

The woman laid out in the coffin in front of us wasn’t Mum

14 September 2019 9:00 am

The receptionist with brown lipstick showed my son and me into a faultless waiting room, whose centrepiece was a big…

Pet health insurance is a scam

14 September 2019 9:00 am

‘The reason vets are so expensive now,’ explained the vet in her snazzy green uniform, ‘is because we can do…

When it comes to Brexit, everything that can be tried will always fail

7 September 2019 9:00 am

It is all beginning to feel like the closing scenes of the 1980 spoof comedy film Airplane! In particular the…

My soulmate Brian Sewell

7 September 2019 9:00 am

Romy Somerset is the sweetest, nicest young girl in London. She’s also my goddaughter and I remember, during her christening…

The mysterious ways of the French

7 September 2019 9:00 am

These new tablets that will save or at least prolong my life have unpredictable side effects which only now, a…

How it feels to be the only Brexiteers in the village

7 September 2019 9:00 am

We are the only Brexiteers in the village. That, at least, is how it feels. Out they come, the far…

How to be a man

31 August 2019 9:00 am

Gstaad   I was reading in these here pages Julie Burchill’s review of Candace Bushnell’s Is There Still Sex in…